The best of both worlds?
“She smothers me with love. My mother all over again. I don’t want it. I’m a man now. I can’t stand it. Bring work home at night. Want to get on in the world. To get on is to have the work done. There is no answer to that. She wants me to come to bed. I don’t want that. I ought to do the work. Grizzles about my golf. A man must have some time with his friends. Says I’m not with the children enough. I might as well tell you, there is a girl. Younger. Beautiful. Makes no demands. It’s I that makes the demands! And it’s good.
‘Say I’ve got the best of both worlds. The children at home and the girl. Both worlds and I should be happy. But I’m not. I’m fussed about it all. And my work. My work is not as good as it was. Deteriorating.”
More messages coming to his brain that can be integrated. Stress is upon him.
Life is for living. Life is for pleasure. Have what fun you can. But the seeking of it brings problems. Problem after problem. Let the mind run quiet. Just quiet. Messages arriving at the brain become integrated. It dawns. It does not have to be spelled out on the screen of the mind for us to see it all in better perspective.
“How can you be lonely if you are married with two young children? Sounds crazy! To me it is the reality of life. The kiddies. They come to me, I love them. I mother them. But that does not fulfill the loneliness within me.
‘My husband. He does not have other women. I am sure of that. He provides well. No long overseas business trips like other men. But there is still a loneliness. An emptiness in my life. We seem to get along all right. That is the terrible paradox. Getting along all right, and the essence of man and woman together, are just poles apart.”
She is poised on the brink. Some other pressure and she will be forced over the edge.
Problems, such as the chronic illness of one of the children, would add to this background. Stress develops, and is likely to show itself in restlessness and irritability.
We have biological needs. Food and sex are obvious enough. If these needs are not satisfied, our brain soon becomes clogged with messages reporting our condition. But other biological needs also play upon our mind, and such a one is the need of man and woman together, in its naturalness and simplicity.
*12/98/5*
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